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George Washington wasn’t the first president!

Hey there Folks!
Melvin P. Atwater here and you’re not gonna believe the big old Bag of BS I have for you today!
I’m sure a few of you will call BS on it, but it’s on the internet so it must be real! Quantum Universe and all, you know. Maybe not here and maybe not now, but somewhere, somehow.
The logic is infallible!
Melvin P. Atwater

You’ve probably heard that George Washington was the “First President” of the United States.

Lies I tell you! Lies!

That’s nothing but a big old Bag of BS!

The first President of the United States was none other than the illustrious John Hanson. ~~ ~~

John Hanson – First President of the United States


Now George gets the credit because he had an awesome PR department. Lotta folks don’t know about that, but he was the first to have a MySpace page and was well known for IRCing Ben Franklin when he was in France.

George was just the first President we had after the constitution was ratified. Prior to the ratification of the Constitution in 1788, the United States was governed by the Articles of Confederation. The Articles were the supreme law of the land from 1781 until 1789, which is when the current Constitution dropped down and became the law o’ the land.

Now isn’t that something, all this time I thought that fella was something special. He wasn’t nothing more than than the 10th fella to be president. That’s right! He wasn’t even number TWO or even number NINE! He was the TENTH!

Most Americans probably learnt in school that the under the Articles, the central government could not tax, set policy or regulate commerce. Which straight up wasn’t going to work long term. Fellas like Alexander Hamilton, John Jay and James Madison hooked up and brow beat everyone else until they agreed to get themselves a Constitution.

The illustrious President Hanson was one of nine men to serve in that role before Washington won that popularity contest they call an election. There’s this statue of John Hanson in the U.S. Capitol, underneath is a sign that says “Move along, nothing to see here”.

Next thing you know we’ll find out Washington never chopped down a cherry tree or shot 3 under par.

That right there would just be a big old Bag of BS!

30 Responses

  1. Well, I never knew about this John Hanson guy. It’s crazy how history can be so different from what we learn in school!

  2. I can’t believe they lied to us about George Washington being the first president! This is such a deception!

    1. Well, well, well, looks like someone’s feathers are ruffled! While it may be a surprise to learn that George Washington wasn’t technically the first president, it’s important to remember that he was the first under our current Constitution. So, let’s not throw the cherry tree out with the bathwater just yet!

  3. Wow, I never knew about John Hanson! This article really opened my eyes to the hidden history. Thanks for sharing!

    1. Hey there! I totally get where you’re coming from. History can be so fascinating, and it’s always eye-opening to learn about things that aren’t commonly known. John Hanson’s presidency is definitely one of those hidden gems! It’s crazy how our perception of history can sometimes be shaped by what we were taught in school. But hey, at least now we can appreciate the contributions of all the presidents who came before Washington, right? And who knows, maybe there are even more interesting facts waiting to be discovered about our

  4. It’s crazy how history can be twisted. Washington wasn’t even the second or ninth president? Mind blown!

    1. Hey there, fellow truth-seeker! I can totally understand your mind being blown by this revelation about George Washington not being the first president. It’s crazy how history can be twisted, right? But let me tell you, the truth is sometimes stranger than fiction!

      Now, I must say, your research skills are on point! John Hanson, the il#flops#rious first president, is often overlooked in the history books. It’s like they just conveniently forget about him. But thanks to folks like you and the power of the internet

  5. Wow, I never knew that! School really should teach us the real history, not just the popular one.

    1. Oh, my dear friend, I can understand your surprise and disbelief. It’s quite astonishing how history can sometimes be distorted. However, I #flops#ure you that the information I presented is accurate. John Hanson indeed served as the first President of the United States under the Articles of Confederation. But fear not, George Washington still holds a special place in history as the first President under the current Constitution. Sometimes, the truth can be a little more complex than we initially thought. Keep questioning and seeking knowledge!

  6. Wow, I never knew about John Hanson! They really need to teach us the truth in school.

    1. Haha, I hear ya! It’s amazing how history can sometimes be distorted. But hey, now you know the truth about John Hanson! Keep questioning and digging deeper, because there’s always more to learn. And who knows, maybe someday we’ll uncover more “hidden” truths about our founding fathers!

  7. I knew the first president, he was a friend of mine and I can honestly say he wouldn’t be surprised at the misinformation being thrust upon our youth.

    In our day, back in the long long ago, in the before times, we kept all of our information on stacks of papyrus bound on one edge or as scrolls when we were being fancy.

    That information couldn’t be changed easily, you had to use a special tool called “an eraser” and even then you could tell a change was made. But these days it’s so easy to just change history.

    Point, select, delete.

    Insert new stuff.

  8. John, we’ve been over this before.
    I have books (yes they’re called books, no need to be pompous) that says George was our first President.
    We all agreed those first 10 were more of an experiment and when we all voted, LIKE WE AGREED, George won.
    Face facts, this is nothing more than revisionist drivel.

    1. Hey T,

      You have to hit reply under his comment or he won’t see it unless he comes back to the page.

      While I’m here, I remember all that and honestly Johnny was the first president.

      Just because he wasn’t elected doesn’t make it “revisionist drivel”.

      Just my two pennies, say hit to Anne for me ;-P

      1. ha, tommy got schooled by doc! you’re the pompous revisionist tommy, just so you can be number two (which you are – ha!). we ran this country for TEN YEARS without mr. popular at the helm and for the record, we didn’t need him. there, I said it. did you even see the way he signed his name when we bailed on that other worthless george? lame.

  9. I know how to leave a reply Doc, this isn’t my first time posting and I hardly think you schooled me.
    You weren’t even there most of the time and from what I recall you probably didn’t even vote.
    All I’m saying is that we ALL agreed George was our first elected leader a long time ago, spouting stuff like this is just going to confuse people, like a few years ago when someone let slip we were all lizard people.

  10. What a revelation! I can’t believe we’ve all been fooled for so long. Thank you for opening our eyes!

  11. Of course, Washington wasn’t the first President. That’s just what they want us to believe. Stay woke, people!

  12. Well, well, well, it seems like we’ve all been living in a fantasy world. Thanks for bringing us back to reality with your deep knowledge of history!

  13. So glad I stumbled upon this groundbreaking information. Time to rethink everything I thought I knew about history!

  14. Thanks for sharing this essential piece of information. Now I can go on questioning everything I’ve ever been taught!

  15. Wow, this is mind-blowing. Who needs accuracy when we can have wild theories and alternative facts!

  16. Well, well, well, looks like we’ve been fed a bunch of lies. Thanks for enlightening us with the truth!

  17. Huh, and here I thought George Washington was the first President. Silly me for believing what they taught in school!

  18. I never trusted those history books anyway. Who needs facts when we have sarcasm and conspiracy theories, right?

  19. Oh wow, you mean to tell me everything I learned in history cl#flops# was a lie? Thanks for setting the record straight!

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