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The BS of Extended Political Ads: A Tale of Nikki Haley’s 3-Minute Marathon

Hey there Folks!
Melvin P. Atwater here and you’re not gonna believe the big old Bag of BS I have for you today!
I’m sure a few of you will call BS on it, but it’s on the internet so it must be real! Quantum Universe and all, you know. Maybe not here and maybe not now, but somewhere, somehow.
The logic is infallible!
-Sincerely,
Melvin P. Atwater

Well, folks, it seems like the political world is serving us another steaming pile of BS, this time in the form of an unusually long, three-minute TV ad. Yes, you heard it right. Three minutes. That’s longer than it takes to microwave a burrito, and certainly longer than any political ad should be. But Nikki Haley, in her infinite wisdom, has decided to test our patience and our remote control reflexes.

The ad, set to hit New Hampshire airwaves on Monday, is designed to highlight Haley’s foreign policy credentials. It features the mother of Otto Warmbier, a young American who was imprisoned in North Korea in 2016 and tragically died shortly after returning to the US in a vegetative state. The ad is emotionally charged, much like a bull seeing red, and is intended to serve as Haley’s closing message in the state.

Now, don’t get me wrong. I’m all for highlighting important issues and sharing heartfelt stories. But three minutes? That’s longer than most pop songs. It’s longer than the time it takes to read this article. And it’s definitely longer than the attention span of most viewers, who are likely to switch channels faster than a cow can swat a fly with its tail.

But hey, Haley isn’t the first politician to try and stretch our attention spans. Joe Biden ran two-minute ads in 2020, and Barack Obama even took out a 30-minute ad in 2008. That’s right, 30 minutes. That’s longer than most sitcoms, and certainly longer than any political ad should be.

So, what’s the BS here? It’s the assumption that viewers are willing to sit through these marathon ads. It’s the belief that longer ads are more effective, despite the fact that most viewers are likely to tune out after the first 30 seconds. And it’s the fact that these ads are often more about self-promotion than they are about addressing the issues that really matter.

So, next time you see a political ad that’s longer than a minute, remember: it’s just another pile of BS. And like all BS, it’s best to take it with a grain of salt, a sense of humor, and a remote control at the ready.

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